Piranhamoose!

Ba dum.......ba dum.......badumbadumbadumbadumbadum.

An uneasy silence falls over the house. Palms sweat. Ears prick. Mouths dry. Something is here. Something...just around the corner. Lurking. Waiting.

Gah! @#$%uelahlfhn!!! I'm being attacked! It's eating my face! It's eating my...faaaaaaaaaaace!

*silence*

Oh. Nevermind. It's just Moose.

Or is it?

We came to a conclusion today. The breeder made a mistake. We drove all the way to Lincolnshire to buy a dog but as it turns out, we are fairly certain that the breeder sold us a furry piranha. Furry piranhas may not be native to England but surely we have one.

Today the eaten list is as follows:

1. Lera's hair

2. Lera's face

3. Lera's neck

4. Lera's notebook

5. Lera's jeans pocket

6. Lera's bum (or parts of it, anyway)

6. The Good Guide to Dog Friendly Pubs

7. John Adams biography

Things not eaten:

1. Moose's rawhide bone

2. Moose's hedgehog

3. Moose's dog

4. Moose's sausage dog

5. Moose's bacon-like dog treat

6. Anything of Matthew's

OK, OK, we kid a little bit. Moose is doing well. He sleeps mostly all the way through the night, he (usually) waits to go outside before he relieves himself, and he makes up for all transgressions with an adorable puppy face and a kiss.

He even survived his first trip to the vet yesterday, during which he had to ride on a London bus all the way to Roehampton. He did well, and the trip to the vet was well worth it. In fact, the vet alerted us to a dangerous new parasite, the French Lungworm, which is causing doggie deaths all over South London and is transmitted through snails and slugs! Since Moose has made something of a hobby of eating the snails and slugs in our yard, it was a very good thing that he got the treatment for it right away.

So far having a piranha...puppy has been a joy on all levels. Moose is a real sweetheart and has already squirmed, whined, and bitten his way into our tender hearts. We love him... even if he is determined to be the destroyer of the earth and the heavens.